What?!?

Mood: A Bit Groggy
Weight: 161
Last ate: Slim-Fast Cappuccino Shake

I had no idea that it had been so long since I posted an entry. The shame. Oh, the shame.

This place is starting to feel less and less like a home. With all the family infighting going on--over a dog, or a car--I do not feel comfortable, or even safe. I tried to be the peacemaker, but no one listens to me. The petty fighting will go on and on, until it escalates to something absolutely ridiculous. Sometimes I feel all alone in this world, with no family to call my own.

Thank God for Bella! She saves me every day. She calms me, gives me perspective on the world, makes me realize I am not alone. She loves me. Bella loves me. Love. Peace. That is everything I want. And she gives it to me. That is something special.

I've had thoughts of getting the hell out of Dodge before the bullets start flying, but I'm really in no position to do that. It crossed my mind to see if my sister would like a roommate, but I think I would just be in the way. Not to mention, I have too much stuff for her small house. I've also considered some type of live-in work, but at a guess I would need a car for that. (How can you take care of someone if you don't have a car?) I guess I'm stuck. My only hope is to be out-and-about as much as possible. I could always stay out all day, come back at night when the smoke clears, and try to get some work done in the peace of darkness.

This is no way to live.

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